156460

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? ...I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face"

"what did the faggot faggot the faggot? because faggot hahahaha"

"How Much Wood Would a Woodchuck Chuck if a Woodchuck Could Chuck Norris? *All of it.* *All of the wood.*"

"Jesus take the wheel. No that's a book. A penny. A rock. DAMMIT JESUS DIDN'T YOU TAKE THAT ENGLISH AS A SECOND LANGUAGE CLASS I RECOMMENDED"

"Why did the Ferguson protesters go home early last night? The whole thing was a gas."

"The presidential race between Hillary and Trump reminds me of the first AVP movie. Whoever wins, we lose."

"How many optometrists does it take to change a lightbulb? 1 or 2. Just 1.... Or 2...?"

"What's worse than 5 dead babies in 1 trash can? 1 dead baby in 5 trash cans"

"I don't know how to do my own taxes or understand how the stock market works, but definitely listen to my political opinions on everything"

"You didn't question the free nachos or the ride in the van. But now that I've got a knife to your throat you're all ""why, why?"""