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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many republicans does it take to disarm the law abiding public so that the government can enforce totalitarianistic and unconstitutional laws? A: None. The Sociali--Democrats do that"

"As a child, 'The Jetsons' gave me unrealistic expectations for the future: like having a wife who loves me & owning a dog."

"The nice thing of living in a small village is that when you don't know what you're doing someone else does."

"You've got to really be careful when ingesting shoes... cause they're usually laced"

"What do you call a Native American who graduated from medical school? A doctor you racist"

"A Mexican walks into a bar The bartender says ""You can stay, but you must sit behind that wall over there."""

"Why would you stay friends with an ex-girlfriend? When you get fired from a job, you don't stay around and watch other people do your job."

"Why did the polygons of Geometric Grove disapprove of their new triangle neighbor? He was a degenerate triangle."

"I'm not saying you're an idiot, I'm typing it."

"That's one healthy flower bed you've got blooming in your backyard. How many bodies do you have buried there? -My attempts at small talk."