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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a psychic midget that just escaped from prison? A small medium at large."

"Why wouldn't Dolores let William eat the corn? Because the maize isn't meant for him."

"Poor Sally! Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock (who's there? ) Not Sally. Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere."

"Everyone at the office is going crazy because I faxed someone a hot dog"

"I saw my ex getting jumped at a party 3 people started beating her up, so I decided to help out...that bitch didn't stand a chance against the 4 of us."

"Whats the worst the thing about having to attend a funeral? The guest of honor always shows up late!"

"My wife was raped by a gang of mimes. They found many ways to get in and out of the box. OR They did unspeakable thing to her."

"Was gonna go to the gym but then I checked Twitter. In 2009"

"Ay girl are you a fire truck? Because your really loud and fucking annoying."

"I like my women like I like my whisky 18 years old and mixed up in coke"