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Joke of the Day

"What did a blind french guy said he wanted for christmas? ""All I want for christmas is yeux"""

"I like my ice cream like I like my women. Plain vanilla, and hopefully if it lies around long enough it will get wet so I don't have to do much with my mouth."

"I'm absolutely incredible in bed. In fact, yesterday I slept 15 hours."

"My pastor said the day gay marriage was made fully legal in the US was worse than 9/11."

"why are the new york jets like hillary clinton? both have Bills to push around"

"What's the difference between Trump and a stripper? Strippers climb polls."

"While there's a motherboard, why isn't there a fatherboard? Well I don't know, but I do know my professor recently installed a new blackboard, hopefully he'll use that to explain the answer."

"How did Jesus get to the other side of the street? He used the Cross Walk."

"Art thief. Did you hear about the discerning art thief who burgled the Impressionist exhibit? He was in it for the Monet."

"*puts bread in toaster* hmm something strange about the toaster today Duck(from in toaster): no there isnt"