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Joke of the Day

"How many Police Officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, they were too busy beating up the room for being black."

"Two peanuts walked into a bar. One was assaulted."

"*LIGHTHOUSE* BATMAN - You call? L/HOUSE KEEPER - Shit, not again man. I am so sorry. BATMAN - Dead seagull on the light? LK -*Nods*"

"What does a vulture bring with him on the airplane? His carrion bag."

"When a man falls asleep next to me, I like to sniff his arm pit. Then he usually gets mad, I have to ride a different bus, it's a big mess."

"Short armed and dangerous. Did you hear about the mind reading midget that escaped from prison? The papers said small medium at large."

"Met a prostitute that will do anything for 100 $ Guess who's writing my take home exam ^^"

"Not sure if I washed the spider down the drain in my shower or if he took one look at me naked and then leapt willingly to his death."

"A Horse Walks Into A Bar And the bartender says ""Why the long face?"" The horse replies, ""My alcoholism is destroying my family"""

"If I hit a baseball and it rolled under the fence and was eaten by a pig, what would it be called as? An inside the pork home-run."