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Joke of the Day

"Waiter: Ready to order? Me: Yes, what goes well with an overbearing sis-in-law with delusions of grandeur? W: ... M: ... W: ... M: Whiskey."

"I logged into MySpace for the first time since 2005. It was full of private messages from women who wanted to ""Blockbuster and Chill""."

"I always feel an intense awkwardness when a woman doesn't choose the iron in a game of Monopoly."

"Why did the stand-up comedian get such bad reviews? He was sitting."

"Two fish swim into a concrete wall... The one fish turns to the other and says, ""Dam."""

"What religion does a drinking feline believe? Cat-holic"

"What do you call an Eskimo optometrist? ...An optical Aleutian. I actually made this one up. But if someone else said it first, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Have you seen the new documentary about white trash? I've only seen the trailer."

"What is a horses favourite TV show? Neeeebours"

"How does procrastination start? I'll tell you tomorrow."