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Joke of the Day

"First Cannibal: ""Have you seen the dentist?"" Second Cannibal: ""Yes he filled my teeth at dinner time."""

"What do you get if you cross pigs with a lot of grapes ? A swine gut !"

"Anyone who can tell if they're speeding up or slowing down a ceiling fan on the first try is a wizard and should not be trusted."

"Why is DeadMau5 bad at math? He drops the base when doing logs."

"Somewhere in another dimension there is a Lingerie store called Victoria Secretes where all the panties already come with discharge on them"

"2010: Didn't jog 2011: Didn't jog 2012: Didn't jog 2013: Didn't jog 2014: Haven't jogged ~ This is a running joke"

"Have you seen 'Wears My Penis? Ooops, typo. Have you seen where my pen is?"

"I just read an article about a woman who killed her husband, boiled his body, and turned it into homemade jelly she kept in her pantry! It was really jarring."

"I was going to post a joke about my poop this morning but it was too corny."

"How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram!"