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Joke of the Day

"Why are there only two hundred and thirty nine beans in a bowl of bean soup? Because just one more and it would be two-farty"

"Just go ahead and arrest the psychopaths who still have egg avatars."

"What did the devil get arrested for? Possession!"

"I've noticed you keep tiny pictures of family members in your wallet. Nice, I didn't know you played. I'm looking to trade my Nana card."

"What job pays you to shoot people but not harm them? A photographer."

"Have you ever wondered what would happen... if a virgin rooster layed a fertilized egg at the top of an infinite staircase?"

"Just saved a bunch of money on my Glenn from The Walking Dead Halloween costume by not showering for a month."

"Why didn't the Avatar want to fight the Fire Nation? Because they gave him Aang-xiety"

"*Ok, don't let them know you're a dog* Him: The job is yours. Here's the keys to your new office. [tosses keys] *catches keys in my mouth*"

"Q: What's every cat's favorite song? - A: Three Blind Mice!"