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Joke of the Day
"I started bleeding out of my ear yesterday.... I think I'm on my HEARiod"
Next Joke
"[DEATH ROW] WARDEN: Last meal? CON: Just a glass of lemonade please *Drinks lemonade/Burps* WARDEN: Pardon [CON WALKS FREE] W: SHIT"
"I can't believe the Toronto maple leafs even have a website They can't even put THREE W's together!"
"Exactly 4 years ago, I asked my college crush out. Today, I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."
"The shutter speed of the iPhone 6's camera is so high... ...it can take a pic of a woman with her mouth shut"
"Why are vaginas called beavers? because beavers eat wood"
"What do you call a union of writers? A writers' block"
"What do you call fake spaghetti? Impasta."
"What's the best machine at the gym? The vending machine."
"Wife: Have you seen my stilettos? Me [6 inches taller and struggling to stand]: Uh *stumble* No"