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Joke of the Day

"What did Mike Tyson say when asked about the time he fought the God of Asgard? ""The loser was 'thore'"""

"I was born half female... You see, my mum was one."

"A man walks into a bar with an apple on his head, and the bartender asks ""Why do you have a pear on your head?"" He replies, ""It's not a peach, it's a plum!"""

"Which actor is a dog's favorite? Bark Ruffaro"

"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow remover? Give her a shovel..."

"It's amazing how many pedestrians confuse ""Right of Way"" with ""Immortality."""

"Women are like Gremlins, get them wet and they get into all sorts of trouble."

"A family walks into a hotel... ... The father goes to the front desk and says ""I hope the porn is disabled."" The guy at the desk replies. ""It's just regular porn you sick fuck"""

"Blonde's Appendicitis A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, ""You have acute appendicitis."" The blonde says, ""That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."""

"What's the biggest lie of the election? Voting machines aren't hackable."