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Joke of the Day

"I woke up this morning wearing a red fuzzy wig, giant oversized shoes and a red nose. I think I must have slept funny."

"I like my women like just like my cars 12 years old and made in Japan Edit: Made in the 90's and topless in the summer?"

"Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton and Jeb Bush jump of a bridge. They do a race who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society"

"What is a good way to describe a tailor that refuses to make clothing for nuns? Non-habit forming"

"What did the Turkish guy say to his babe when she invited him to eat? Ke-bab"

"The doctor told the couple to eat lemons before sex to avoid pregnancy. ........But there was a mis-conception."

"I hate people who make generalisations. They're all hypocrites."

"Ladies, never agree to do an@l, save it for when you do something so bad a blowjob can't fix things."

"[working at Bed Bath & Beyond] ME: Hi there, may I help you? What are you looking for? CUSTOMER: Shower head. ME: Sir, please, we just met."

"how many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None"