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Joke of the Day

"Nebraska bill allows K - 12 teachers to carry guns to school. In their defense, it is really hard to get a 9 year old to shut the fuck up."

Next Joke
 
"You know when your cat looks at your kids like ""thanks to you I've been out of food for 3 days and nobody's noticed"" .....?"
"Why are men so smart while having sex? Because they are plugged into a fucking know-it-all."
"There is a big fat naked guy and another naked guy behind him who has a big nose. The front guy turns around, what happens to guy behind? He broke his nose."
"What's the difference between saying sorry and apologizing? You can say sorry at a funeral."
"Wrong hole! It's too tight! -me putting on my watch, you pervs"
"Why is the blood of christ wine? Because he drank religiously"
"Socialism jokes are only funny if everybody gets them. Its Reality."
"Friend's Fb post: In search of a coat hanger My comment: Are you pregnant or are you locked out of your car? I've been on Twitter too long"
"Attention Prayer Warriors: My neighbor left town for a funeral today. Please pray for God to protect & guide me as I steal his barbecue pit."