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Joke of the Day

"I'm thinking about starting a feminist group. It's called Ovary-Action."

"No Carl, I said ""lick her"" not wicker. Put the patio furniture away."

"Why are black people afraid of motorcycles? They'd get caught in the chain."

"ME: Leave me alone! You're not my real dad! CRAWDAD: [patiently] I am doing my best to raise you on my own. Now eat your plankton."

"They say that dog is mans best friend ... ... but I don't have enemies that stare me directly in the eye whilst taking a shit on my carpet"

"Why is Harry Potter better than Jews? He made it out of the chamber."

"I always look for the best looking cashier at the supermarket and always end up at the self checkout lane"

"What's black and found at the top of a stair case? Stephen Hawking after a house fire."

"My friend was the best at Russian Roulette. He only lost once."

"Why did the female war reenactors need to throw away their costumes? Because they weren't period-appropriate!"