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Joke of the Day

"So a girl asked me if I was a tits or an ass man.. so I said, well my friends always tell me, ""You're an ass, man!"" Ba dum tiss."

"Why doesn't china have casinos? Because they hate Tibet."

"It's been 14 seconds why haven't you replied yet"

"What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye, matey!"

"Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a pub... Barman says ""Is this some kind of joke?"""

"Countries I can't believe Japan have not attacked: Wales"

"Being God means never having to say you're sorry. Or anything, really."

"Just so we're on the same page, I'm on 137."

"Walking around Brooklyn, slapping people's brunches to the ground."

"What did the terrorist's ghost say? BOOM!"