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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a pizza and a pizza joke? Pizza jokes can't be topped! :D"

"They say we are created in Gods image. So does that mean he smells the toilet paper after wiping too?"

"How can you tell if someone voted Green Party? Don't worry, they'll fucking tell you."

"You say, ""POE-TAY-TOE."" I say, essential ingredient for a distilled spirit."

"People say filling animals with helium is wrong but i say, whatever floats your goat."

"Why is it so hard to pull over on the Pirate Highway? Because there's a parrot on the shoulder."

"Playing that 'Y'ALL READY FOR THIS?' song on your iPhone, full blast while entering a public toilet stall, feels pretty good."

"Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog licking his balls. The first guy says, ""Man, I wish I could do that. The second guy says, ""Pet him, maybe he'll let you."""

"What does your mother and a neckbeard have in common? They both love Ten D's"

"The opening ceremony for our ribbon repair business was pretty confusing."