152024

Joke of the Day

"Why were there 600 Mexicans at the Alamo? They only had 2 cars."

"I really like my eggs over-easy. Today, I was gonna try them scrambled... ...but it's not worth the whisk."

"I submitted a glass pane in for a competition. I'm hoping I can window."

"What do you call a skinny tree that raps? Slim Shady"

"I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it. It's true, I saw it with my own eyes."

"Me: Got a hot date this weekend? Coworker: Ummm...no. Me: I know. I was just reminding you. Coworker...."

"You Shook Me All Night Long is a great song that also describes what I do to my husband when he's snoring."

"I always feel bad for seedless watermelon because what if they wanted to have babies."

"Ice is a lot like girls They both get wet when you eat them"

"Why did Jesus stop playing Hockey? He just kept getting nailed to the boards. Sorry too anyone offended, but come on, why are you here if you get offended. PS, Sorry Jesus, its funny!"