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Joke of the Day

"I say 'tomato', you say 'put your hands where I can see them and exit the vehicle slowly' ."

"Orange Soda I've always dreamt of having a cock as long as a 2 litre bottle of orange soda, and just as wide. It's just Fanta-sea really"

"Help me practice my knife throwing skills. You catch."

"What's Forrest Gump's password? 1Forrest1"

"There has to be a line where 9/11 jokes aren't funny anymore... For me it's somewhere around the 70th floor. I'm sorry, I know that was terrible. I'll see myself out."

"I came up with a new recipe for avocado and duck. I'm going to call it Quackamole."

"What is the difference between a Siberian husky and an Alaskan husky? About 1500 miles."

"I can do number tricks in my head They do cartwheels and handstands."

"I almost choken on food and the whole time it was happening I was just thinking ""What a cliche way for a fat person to die of"""

"Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake."