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Joke of the Day

"It all. The title says it all."

"Steak puns... a rare medium well done."

"What's worse that burning the turkey on thanksgiving? Being a starving African Child."

"[Game of Thrones] How do Littlefinger's prostitutes get in & out of the brothel? Hodor."

"LOWERCASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS That is an example of a capitalist."

"So this dude is like, ""Where are you going with all that Element 83?"" and I was like ""None of your bismuth"""

"Carl: Gonna be a hot one today. Me: Tell me something I don't know. Carl: Male ostriches can roar like lions. Me: Fair enough, Carl."

"If you ever see me in a restaurant, please approach my table and do your Drunk Uncle impression. Especially if I'm with family or a girl."

"What do you say to a crazy person who's talking to themselves? Hey, the person you're talking to said to give me a few bucks."

"Why do people keep asking me what I'm going to be doing in three years? I don't have 2020 vision."