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Joke of the Day

"Why does Mexjco do poorly in the olympics? Because all the Mexicans who can run fast, swim fast and jump high are in the states."

"someone brought a box of lemons to work and emailed out saying ""there's lemons"" and now every one has a lemon on their desk. why"

"How do we create jobs? I thought he was already dead"

"What does a virgin eat for breakfast? Has it been that long (Depending on the audience, it may be important to complete with a comedic pause and) ... ... since breakfast?"

"How do you know the Alphabet is celebrating Christmas? When there is no ""L"""

"Why did the vampire have to get glasses? Because he was blind as a bat! (My 4 year old sister came up with this one yesterday)"

"Unfortunately, the house having 'period features' turned out to mean we had to get the decorators in once a month."

"What do you call a fat alien? An extra-cholesterol. ...I'm so sorry."

"Why do Catholic priests like Indian restaurants so much? Unlimited fresh naans!"

"This Prius we rented is pretty sweet. It can go 0-60 in 6 hours."