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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a man who repeatedly stabs his raisin bran on a daily basis? A cereal killer"
Next Joke
"What do you call a gold fish with no teeth? A shit-fuck McGee."
"Grammar. The difference between feeling your nuts, and feeling you're nuts."
"Every 5 seconds, somewhere on this planet a woman gives birth to a child. I think! We must find this woman and stop her."
"Me: Oh my god, that cat is adorable! She's the cutest kitty I've ever seen! Cat: I just want to be friends."
"I named my dog Rembrandt That way I can say ""have you seen my Rembrandt?"""
"I still remember what my grandpa told me before he kicked the bucket. ""I wonder how far I can kick this bucket"""
"That awkward moment when you accidently knock a 90 year old over trying to get to the buffet first."
"What's a down-side of being a paedophile? You have to go to bed early."
"Dolphins are really smart. Within a few weeks of captivity they can train people to stand on the edge of the pool and feed them."