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Joke of the Day
"what room zombies and vampires can't enter? the living room."
Next Joke
"What do you call a sad robot? A woebot. :("
"Him: Let's get you out of that dress. Me: Be careful Him: Why? Me: If you tug at my Spanx hard enough, I'll pop open like a can of biscuits."
"I'm shit at telling jokes. I always punch up the fuck line."
"What did the middle eastern man say to his marijuana enthusiast wife? Stoner!"
"What do you do when you see an upside down dolphin? You flipper!"
"If you're not buying kraft mac and cheese you might be buying an impasta."
"It's claimed Macaulay Culkin's health problems are linked to a difficult childhood. No sh1t. His parents forgot to take him on holiday 4 times"
"Never mind money, jobs, and real estate...I wonder what the youngs will do to us when they realize we've taken all the good usernames?"
"What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog? Hey! We really DO taste like chicken!"