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Joke of the Day

"In case of emergency, exits can be located at the log out, delete, deactivate, hide and block features. Thank you for flying with Facebook"

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"What's the difference between a sick elephant and seven days ? One is a weak one and the other one week !"
"What should we call this giant advertising board? PHIL: A philboard BILL: I have a better idea"
"Why shouldn't you date a tennis player? Love means nothing to them."
"Revenge idea if a girlfriend dumps you: sneak into her house, tighten the lids on all her jars."
"why did the cheese stick hate football? because he wasn't first string!"
"Why are people who work in IT amazing at relationships and sex? When there is a problem they just turn them off and back on"
"I know I know So what do you call a black woman who has had 9 abortions? A Crime Fighter!!!"
"I just swallowed my record player's needle and nothing's happened to me, nothing's happened to me, nothing's happened to me, nothing's happe"
"Chinese Food: $16.72 Gas to Get to Restaurant: $1.94 Getting Home and Realizing They Forgot One of Your Food Containers: Riceless"