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Joke of the Day

"Man: ""Waitress, can I ask you something about the menu please"" Waitress: *slaps his face* ""The men I please are none of your damn business!"""

"Dark humour is like food. Not everybody gets it."

"Forget about sexy, I am bringing good manners back!"

"What do elephants sing at christmas ? Noel-ephants Noel-ephants..."

"What do Mexican jokes have in common with black jokes? Once you know Juan, you know Jamal"

"Me: *passes ransom note* Mom: 2 bags of unmarked cookies? Me: Or you'll never see the cat alive! Mom: He's behind you. Me: STUPID KITTY!"

"Best pick up line. Hey is your name Sandy Hook? Cuz I wanna shoot a bunch of kids inside you."

"How do lions like their steaks? RAWR"

"Tell the barista your name is Beetlejuice and quietly walk out."

"A Higgs boson walks into a church, ""We don't allow Higgs bosons in here!"" shouts the priest. ""But without me, how can you have mass?"" asks the particle."