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Joke of the Day

"If someone ever intimidates you just remember that they're 70% water. *Are you afraid of water...?* Well you should be 300,000 people drown every year."

"I let a blind man borrow some money the other day He said he'll pay me back the next time he saw me"

"Black Guy shot 15 times by the Alabama Police Worst case of suicide they had ever seen."

"Where do cats go when they die? Purrgutory."

"My kid spilled milk in the back of my car last week ... Now I tell people it has a stinky dairy-air."

"I took the batteries out of my carbon monoxide alarm... ...the loud ringing noise from it was giving me a headache and making me dizzy."

"My coffee shop in Tokyo hasn't had many customers in the last couple of months... It's ok now though, people are starting to drift in."

"*cheats at bowling by rolling into the pins*"

"To all the people who said that I'd never be able to write a joke about Bukkake, hah, in your face."

"I just won $1,000,000, and I've decided to give a quarter to charity. Now I have $999,999.75."