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Joke of the Day
"WARNING: Objects in profile pics are not as pretty as they appear."
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"Bartender, I'd like you to bring that brunette at the end of the bar a slice of your finest ham."
"Why are farmers so afraid of aliens? Tractor beams."
"Did you hear about the clever nun who got tricked? She was nun the wiser"
"If you ever see me with one of those stick figure family bumper stickers it means I'm dead and someone is wearing my skin"
"Politicians only kiss babies because it might be theirs."
"Why do ecologists like lepers? Because they're biodegradable!"
"What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair"
"A three-legged dog sits down at the bar Orders a whiskey. Bartender asks,""What brings you to these parts?"" Dog responds,""Lookin for the sonofabitch who shot my paw.'"
"What's the difference between an illegal Mexican and ET? ET looked better, smelled better, learned English, didn't claim benefits, had his own fucking bike, and wanted to go home!"