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Joke of the Day
"Bartender, I'd like you to bring that brunette at the end of the bar a slice of your finest ham."
Next Joke
"It's the same old story; boy meets girl in park... ... boy parks meat in girl"
"The life of a penis is a sad one.... His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his bestfriend's a pussy, and his owner beats him."
"""goodbye, cruel world"" *hops into duck pond with bread strapped to my entire body*"
"So I was going by this farm the other day... and I was like, hay."
"Of course I can handle constructive criticism *resents you for the next 50 yrs"
"If at first you don't succeed . . . don't try skydiving."
"What do you call a black brick with three holes in it? A polish bowling ball."
"So if you help Jack get on the horse... do you help Jack off the horse?"
"To get your ""porn star name,"" take the street you grew up on and see whether it's in a low-income area with a high rate of domestic abuse."