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Joke of the Day
"Why was old Bilbo's body found with a massive erection? Because old hobbits die hard."
Next Joke
"Is the end of the world happening right now? The internet is not working on my phone, so that was my first logical conclusion."
"What's better than Chrisopher Walken? Ted Danson."
"My girlfriend buys candles the same way I buy weed. She looks at the color, opens it and smells it, buys it, then lights it on fire to relax"
"Corporations big and small rejoice as taxes are lowered in St. Louis for businesses. Once again proving that famous saying; Missouri loves companies."
"Reasons Pluto is so cold: 3) It's far from the sun 2) Its atmosphere is too thin to trap heat. 1) It found out we said it's not a planet."
"Life is like a bowl of soup You only get blown if you're hot"
"Meet Brian, my monkey butler. He's gonna help out around the office. *Monkey flinging office equipment out the window* Brian hates clutter."
"Why do redditors hate the robot NASA sent to Mars? Because Curiosity killed the cat!"
"The doctor told Harry Potter to drink 2L of Water a Day, but Harry didn't listen. Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone."