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Joke of the Day

"There really isn't a good way to tell your boss you hate him and want him eaten by hyenas."

"I'm beginning to think my best chance of fame is if someone names a syndrome after me."

"We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday, for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was ""Michael""."

"Everybody's getting Oreos with their Christmas cards this year. Related: Don't eat cookies while you're licking envelopes."

"Why did Steve hate being the youngest clone? Because all his genes were hand me downs."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, because feminists cant change anything."

"Theres an egg on yor head... Only yoking."

"What is Minecraft? It's Hitler's lesser known second book about his love of knitting. Officially the title is Mein Kraft but, the kids like this spelling more."

"This is an emergency! *Begs to borrow strangers phone *starts scrolling through pics"

"Knock Knock *Knock Knock.* Who's there? *This bagel is for.* This bagel is for who? *Whom. This bagel is for whom.*"