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Joke of the Day

"I'm beginning to think my best chance of fame is if someone names a syndrome after me."

"When people ask why I have a ""Trump 2016"" sticker on my car I say it's for safety. When i'm pulled over, it's the quickest way to tell the Cop i'm white."

"I'm a take me or leave me kind of girl. Wait, where ya going?"

"What's your best ""A guy walks into a bar"" joke"

"What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety? Past tense."

"I only do yoga so I can hold my arms up long enough to get my hair in a ponytail."

"i always wear this epi pen its rly special. my friend gave it to me literally as he was dying it seemed very important to him that i have it"

"I was told to drink a lot of Perrier My fizzy eau therapist insists on it."

"Like every good global citizen I've reduced my power consumption by 50% by running all my power off the neighbours while they're on vacation"

"Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are talking. Harry says, ""Ron, I'm gay."" ""Are you fucking serious?!"" asks Ron. ""Yeah...that too,"" says Harry."