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Joke of the Day

"What's a clown's favorite thing to eat? Really anything that's heavy enough to beat somebody to death with, such as a motorcycle helmet or a cannonball."

"Why don't black people go on cruises? Not falling for that one again."

"[gynecologist making small talk during an exam] DOCTOR: So you're in the military? HER: Yes DOCTOR: Well thank you for your cervix"

"there's a new chocolate bar being sold in the middle east called Allahu Snackbar"

"They say your memory is the first thing to go But I can't remember losing that"

"I'm really good at fighting.... I won my last fight by 100 metres"

"I was walking along and I saw a guy fall into a nest of mosquitoes... ...it was malarious!"

"What is the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Phelps can finish a race"

"Went to see a show about the dictionary. It was a play on words."

"Marriage is so disrespected as an institution nowadays that soon brides may be tossing the groom and keeping the bouquet."