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Joke of the Day

"Dave is coming over. ""Dave Wilson or Dave who thinks he's Spider-Man?"" [loud thud on the roof] BACK DOOR IS OPEN, DAVE"

"What do you call a blind german? A Not - see (Nazi)"

"Parents tell you their baby's weight because they have no other information. They can't say ""Meet Jim, a free spirit who's into yodeling."""

"Zombies What is a zombies' favorite food? Brains. What is a dyslexic zombies' favorite food? Brians."

"""We're going to chop off your testicles so we can love you until we decide you need to die."" --pet owners"

"My electric toothbrush broke so now I have to use my acoustic one"

"Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear."

"Weather Channel I taped a Weather Channel logo on our living room window. It's like having an extra TV."

"Two elephants are in a bath tub One asks the other ""Pass the soap"". The other one replies, ""No soap, Radio!"""

"Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? Penis envy."