149241

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the farmer who tried to be a stand up comedian? His jokes weren't dairy funny."

"What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, she's got a grenade in her mouth"

"I hate it when I make a typo in my post title and I can't chnage it."

"Two wrongs don't make a right Take your parents for example"

"""why aren't you in school?"" ""i'm too cool for school, officer."" *checks cop computer* ""checks out, youre free to go."" kid is undercover nerd"

"Dr: I'm giving u a proton-pump inhibitor Me: LIKE A GHOSTBUSTER? D: No for acid reflu *sees tears welling in my eyes* yes for busting ghosts"

"What do you call a loaf of grumpy bread? Sourdough!"

"What do you call a guy who is in color guard? A flaggot"

"Now that Britain has left the EU, you'll need a Visa to get in and around ...for everything else, there's Mastercard."

"Oh you like Oreos? Name five of their albums. And I'm talking their obscure shit like watermelon, none of this main stream birthday cake shi"