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Joke of the Day
"I stayed up all night long to see where the sun went... ...then it dawned on me."
Next Joke
"""Dad, why couldn't the doctors save grandpa's life? ""Doesn't matter son, he would have suffocated in the coffin"""
"I don't want to live forever... But I do want to see the end of the DFS* sale. *Insert regional sofa store"
"""This is OnStar. How can we assist?"" ""What are you wearing?"" ""Do I need to get a supervisor?"" ""Like a threesome? Is that part of my plan?"""
"What does the handyman who has no legs wear on his head? The handycap."
"I think Head & Shoulders should have a body wash line called Knees & Toes"
"What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels. Credit to my gymnastics coach"
"[Job interview] ""Under ""skills"" you have odd compliments."" ""You look like you'd have soft bones. ""Thank you?"""
"A riddle: it's yellow and if you push the button it turns red... A chick in a blender."
"What's the similarity between Michael Jackson and a raped Middle Eastern woman? They got stoned to death."