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Joke of the Day

"Would the Government cope in a zombie apocalypse? Vacant, horrible, disoriented people stumbling around without purpose. Plus the zombies."

"What did one dehydrated French man say to the other? What are we going to do now, Pierre?"

"My friends keep telling me I'm in the closet. I just tell them it's Narnia business."

"I feel like Tampax at a good place, but wrong time..."

"You know where the most original posts on reddit are? /r/Jokes"

"*interrupts your class* Girl sorry to embarrass you, but I wrote this for you *whips out guitar, fucks up intro* wait. *tries again* wait."

"What is robin going to get for Christmas? An oviposition set"

"[to astronaut brother] Ooooh la la Gary's going to SPACE *does jerkoff motion* I'll be here on EARTH where my pizza & tv won't FLOAT AWAY"

"The past, present and the future started fighting. It was in*tense*"

"""Always remember me."" - Anonymous."