148980
Joke of the Day
"Where do you find an old Onion article? In thier archives."
Next Joke
"Today is the 1 year anniversary of the day i decided to get sober. And tomorrow is the anniversary of the day I decided sobriety wasn't for me."
"Saying, ""I'm sorry,"" is the same as saying, ""I apologize."" Except at a funeral. - Demetri Martin"
"They refused to take my order just because I was wearing a dastardly Dracula cape. The people at the blood bank have no sense of humour."
"What is a goat's favourite form of comedy? Satyre."
"My boss just said, ""Everyone dies alone."" I told him, ""you don't have to die alone, just get in your car and aim for a school bus."""
"Why can't you escape the angry forest? Because there are mad trees."
"Why was Jon Snow so successful at basketball? he knew where to put it.."
"You know why the undertaker was fired? He made a grave mistake."
"KILLER: I'M GONNA CATCH YOU ME: YOU'LL NEVER CA- [stops running to pet a dog]"