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Joke of the Day
"The True Secret of Ignorance... ...you're looking in the wrong place."
Next Joke
"I have a time phobia. *looks at watch, panics *looks at clock, panics *looks at thyme ""This I can handle."""
"""Stressed"" backwards is ""desserts"" so chill and have that cupcake."
"me: wow the stars are beautiful gf: omg babe they really are me: u know who else is beautiful? gf: *blushes* who? :3 me: Harambe"
"In Europe it's called fruit by the 1/3rd of a meter."
"One from the 1970's . . . What's uptight, outta sight and in the groove? A tampon."
"So a police officer is called out to the scene where a Mercedes is wrapped around a tree, He said ""Well, I guess that's the way the Mercedes Benz"""
"There's 3 kinds of people in this world people who can count, and people who can't count"
"Hide a metal rake in your leaf pile to keep the neighborhood kids from messing it up."
"I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours."