198094

Joke of the Day

"I have a time phobia. *looks at watch, panics *looks at clock, panics *looks at thyme ""This I can handle."""

"I like my maths... ...how I like my sex: hard and fast. (difficult, but clear-cut)"

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No i-dear What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no i-dear"

"Well they were right. If you shave around it it looks bigger Damn nose.."

"Some of your timelines are my morning paper."

"I'm no mathlete, but I CAN tell you that a 6 y/o running at 8 mph chasing an ice cream truck moving at 10 mph flies 7.4 ft if you trip him."

"Who lost the American Presidential Debate? America."

"What happened to the girl who went fishing with a group of men? She returned home with a red snapper."

"Why did the PHP programmer go to the optician? because he didn't C#"

"Why do women sound like they're having an orgasm when they play tennis? And why does my mother play Tennis in her bedroom?"