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Joke of the Day

"Did you ever hear about the vegan, the atheist, and the crossfitter who walked into a bar together? I don't know how you haven't heard about them, they told everyone."

"What did one tree say to the other? Nothing. They bark."

"So I was at the Library today .. And a black Gentleman came over to me and asked where the coloured printer was. I replied ""Man its 2016 you can use any printer!"""

"You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands... For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry."

"I had a friend who had a fear of flying. I told him that statistically, the modern airplane is more afraid of us than we are of it."

"What's the worst thing you can say to a Jewish bread delivery man? What's the challah cost?"

"""Adorkable,"" I say nervously, looking into the bathroom mirror. ""Adorkable. Adorkable."" A fire erupts behind me. Zooey Deschanel emerges."

"I live with my wife in a two story house... ""I'm too tired"" and ""I have a headache"" are the only two stories I hear..."

"TIFU by assigning a temporary history teacher to a math class Oops, wrong sub"

"Muslims are like the common cold and SJWs are like AIDS. It's easy to fight off a cold unless you have AIDS."