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Joke of the Day

"A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. He orders a drink."

"How do you use a philosophy degree in a professional context? *Why* would you like fries with that?"

"Why can't you tell when a Pterodactyl goes to the toilet Becuase the P is silent"

"I don't have a vagina, but I'm pretty sure sex feels a lot like cleaning your ear out with a Q-tip."

"Someone told this at a Disney campground. What's large, gray, and comes in quarts? An Elephant."

"I am sick and tired of women jokes!! period!"

"What do you call an actor who has given up civilized life and gone to live in the wilderness? Will Feral. Edit: I tried"

"Fruits are single-handedly keeping the sticker industry afloat."

"Did you hear about the restaurant on Mars? ....The food was great, but there was no atmosphere."

"[ER] HIPSTER: I fell off my acoustic motorcycle & broke my mustache twirler. DOC:... H: I fell off my bike & broke my hand. D: Rub kale on it."