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Joke of the Day

"You are what you eat... ...said one squirrel to another. The other said in disbelief, ""You're nuts."""

"ants what has 2 legs, and eats ants? Uncles"

"Three cows are standing in a field. Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease? Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter Cow 3: Holy shit a talking cow!"

"I just want to rub all over you........ ........with the front end of my car."

"I've seen suns that weren't as bright as my cell phone is at 6AM."

"What is like tomato but better? DD-WRT"

"What happens to Nitrogen when you put it in direct sunlight? It becomes DAYTROGEN!"

"What noise does a ceiling fan make? GO CEILING!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!! YOUR NUMBER ONE!! YAY, CEILING RULES!!!"

"I once stayed in a motel that was so seedy, the Bible in the drawer only had 7 commandments"

"What is the longest rope in the world? Europe"