148397

Joke of the Day

"The doctors all doubted me. They all thought I couldn't do it. They said I couldn't fight them all at once and well, they were 100% right"

"<----- gave a man a heart attack by admitting he was right"

"I put a huge brown paper bag over this keg. So people won't know I'm drinking at work."

"TIL if you type your password for all to see it gets censored. Look: 1337Penis Edit: GOD DANG IT"

"Man in a pasture face down A man lays face down in the pasture with a backpack on his back and flies buzzing around him. Question: Whats in his backpack? Answer: Parachute"

"If you come home after work and your wife greets you saying she got a massive pay raise from her boss at work, remember to not kiss her on the lips."

"Adding ""and shit"" to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and shit."

"*covers kids eyes* ""Hey Billy, guess who?"" ""Dad!"" ""Nope"" ""I knw its u dad. I know ur voice"" ""Its not ur dad"" ""Stop jking"" ""Ur adopted"""

"Do you know why russians always rush B? Because they already Russia."

"Whats the difference between a retard and a woman? The retard doesn't need to be buggered to think he's special."