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Joke of the Day

"Difference Between a Midget and STD? Ones a clever runt...the other is a running cunt"

"Women wake up yawning and men with an erection. Coincidence? I think not."

"What English King invented the fireplace ? Alfred the grate !"

"Why does West Virginia have so many unsolved murders? There are no dental records and all the DNA is the same."

"Why is your mom like a vacuum? She sucks, blows, and gets laid in the closet. Not to mention she also gets turned on by your dad"

"My To Do List: 1. Buy a flat screen TV. 2. Hang it on a wall. 3. Put a tub of boiling water under the TV 4. Watch ""The Ring"" and see tht bitch fall when she crawls outta my TV."

"The Pope is sick. Apparently the Pope resigned because he was sick with bird flu. He got it from a Cardinal."

"I am the Michelangelo of writing research papers. He started the Sistine Chapel ceiling the night before it was due, right?"

"How far can this plane go with just one engine? All the way to the crash site!"

"Why is the new Windows OS called Windows 10 Because 789"