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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. "

"My last girlfriend ate a like a bird She literally banged her head repeatedly onto the table to eat"

"A doe walks out of a forest... and says ""Well I'll never do that for a buck again."""

"Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean."

"What does the Jewish Bruce Wayne drive? The Shabbat-Mobile."

"Why didn't the doctor use Twitter to tell the patient that he had a deadly disease? Because the condition was untweetable."

"I bet Oscar Pistorius has a rough time in prison. He can't even stand up for himself."

"Expected delivery while I was out so left courier a note saying ""Please leave with neighbour"". I've just seen them heading off together."

"Finished my first short film. It's a horror/drama that will scare and make you weep. It's basically just footage of me naked."

"Why was the gay guy fired from the sperm bank? He was caught drinking on the job."