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Joke of the Day
"It's scary to think that people like you are graduating from college."
Next Joke
"What's the opposite of the Virgin Islands The Caymin Islands."
"A girl drinks 4 cosmos over a span of 60 minutes. 25 mins later, she texts 3 of her besties. How many emojis will she use? Show your work."
"Q. How do you drown a blonde? A1. Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool. A2. Stick a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool."
"How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!"
"There are 2 kinds of people in this world, those who can count and those who cannot count.. I'm the 1st kind of person, I can count."
"*accidentally uses flash while trying to take pic of funny looking person on the bus* ... *makes distant thunder noises with mouth*"
"What's the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest? The bomb vest actually does something when triggered."
"What do laws and virgins have in common? They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)"
"What's the similarity between communism and a pencil? They both only really work on paper"