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Joke of the Day

"What weighs 150lbs, stands in the kitchen and takes the piss out of your underpants? A washing machine."

"(Date) ""What's wrong?"" Oh nothing I'm just a nervous hummer ""Aw how cute!!"" *perfectly hums the entire Jurassic Park theme at full volume*"

"What do you get if you inject a baby goat with chimpanzee DNA? Thrown out of the petting zoo."

"If you ever see a creepy clown... Go for the juggler"

"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down."

"What is the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has the pricks outside."

"Damn girl are you sitting on a F5 key? Cos' that ass is refreshing"

"Think you can save humanity? Well, Jesus nailed it."

"Reddit, You are too cool... ...you give me frostbite."

"I have a joke to tell. Can you reddit?"