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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a rap battle? Black-on-black rhyme"

"What did the German physicist use to drink his beer? Ein stein. - From Big Nate, as told by my kid."

"Who called it confronting ur husband Stanley about flirty texts from a girl named Rebecca from a former soviet state and not Who'sbeckystan?"

"I came home to my wife yelling ""The square root of pi!"" angrily. I told her she was being irrational."

"Meeting new people and trying my best to act all sunglasses emoji."

"LISTEN,,, Every pizza can be a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself."

"Why did the left shoe marry the right? Because they were ""sole""-mates :)"

"Pessimist: This can't get any worse. Optimist: Yes it can!"

"Tinder announced a new feature this week which gives users 37 gender options to choose from And it's now easier than ever to avoid matching with the mentally unstable"

"[moses parts sea] Slaves: wow! Why we running away if u can do shit like that? Lets go back & claim the pyramids Moses: thats my only trick"