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Joke of the Day

"A blonde was watching the news and saw that two Brazilian skydivers died in a horrific accident. She responds with, ""two Brazilian? Is that more than a billion?""."

"If you had a donkey and it bit off my rooster's legs, what do you have? Two feet of my cock in your ass."

"A dog peed on my bike today. Of course I did not put up with that. I peed all over it immediately."

"the year is 2086 and pizzas are delivering young men to your house"

"I relate to Game of Thrones because much like my own life, I have no idea what's going on and there's a lot of sex and wine drinking."

"When you watch Jersey Shore, Darwin cries."

"When I was a kid my fairy godmother asked me if I wanted a long penis or a long memory I forget my response."

"Germanwings 'Knock Knock' joke. *Knock Knock* Who's there? *A Germanwings pilot* A Germanwings pilot who? **LUBITZ, LET ME IN GODDAMNIT, YOU'RE GONNA CRASH THE PLANE!!**"

"How do you drown a polar bear? Cut a hole in the ice. Put a line of peas around the hole. When the polar bear takes a pea, kick him in the ice hole."

"How does a American mom know her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son's cock"