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Joke of the Day

"The average life insurance policy is $100,000. How much is the policy for a white supremacist? 3k."

"I love arguing with you so much, I'll bring a Ouija board to your funeral."

"My friend wants to be frozen to 273.15C after he dies. But at least we know (_) ( _)>- (_) he was 0K."

"R2-D2 was the most vulgar movie character of all time... They bleeped out every word he said!"

"TIFU by reading a TIFU I forgot they're always horrible. Tl;dr: TIFU = bad"

"bollywood horror movies are just bipasha basu doing a item no. with a third world actor"

"On the news tonight they said a skull-fucker was on the loose... everyone should keep an eye out for him."

"What do you call your GPS if it has the voice of Terry Crews? Crews Control."

"Why does Stephen Hawking have a boring sex life? You can't 69 in binary."

"My wife texted me at lunch ""Window's frozen"" ""Pour warm water on it, then lightly tap the edges with a hammer and chisel"" I replied. Ten minutes later, she called back. ""We need a new computer now""."