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Joke of the Day
"I'd say my girlfriend is a five. If you count the thumb."
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"2 men walk into a bar... You'd think the 2nd man would've ducked"
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick Question! Feminists can't change anything."
"My Grandfather died in a concetration camp. He fell out of a really tall guard tower. so sad r.i.p"
"My toddler tried out and age aproporiate pickup line ""Hey baby, you've got some fiiiiiiine motor skills."""
"Knock knock... Who's there? Poo. Poo who? POOYOUMOTHAFUCKKKKKKAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! /r/unexpectedthuglife"
"They say it takes talent to keep making movies after 50 Apparently they haven't said this to Steven Seagal"
"Friend: I need your advice. Me: Wear less eyeshadow. Friend: I meant about my love life. Me: Friend: Me: Friend: Me: Wear less eyeshadow."
"If you were born in September... Then, you can be sure that your parents started the New Year, with a bang."
"Do you know what the difference is between a white person and a black person that sell drugs? One is a pharmacist and one is a drug dealer!"