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Joke of the Day

"Two girls are playing in a sandbox One girl says: ""My daddy's penis is this big"" and holds her hands 8"" apart. The asian girl replies: ""My daddy's penis is only half that size. It still hurts."""

"what if family matters took place today.... urkel would make an app. laura would have a blog. eddie listens to podcasts. carl is on atkins"

"Who decided to call them a personal trainer and not a gym reaper?"

"What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? ""Oh sheet!"""

"Two condoms walk past a gay bar... one turns to the other and says ""Hey, do you wanna get..... shitfaced?"" (sorry if you saw this already)"

"Dear Couples Who Fight In Public, stop trying to whisper and would it kill you to include some backstory."

"If you love Christmas so much, why don't you merry it?"

"Yo momma's so white... When she passes through a prism more prisms come out"

"What do you call two chess enthusiasts bragging in a lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

"What does a child with stickers have in common with a cocaine addicted DJ? They both love to scratch and sniff. ^(sorry if it's a repost I'm not here often)"